More vastly gripping machismo-core for the angry
suburban teenager in all of us. I tried to have an
open mind when I put this chunk of plastic into my
stereo. I mean, I do love Assfactor 4, but their
misshapen, openly off-key, salt-on-an-open-wound
vocals got tiresome when 9,750 other bands all did the
exact same thing.
First the art-work: a live band shot adorns the cd
cover of the group getting down and dirty with their
token long-hair on bass, otherwise shaved heads,
backward baseball caps (Ever seen The Jerry Springer
show? They look like guests.), and two singers trying
hard to look like they aren’t really trying as they
vent their retarded angst on another arms-folded
"hard-core" crowd who probably got to the concert in
BMW’s. "Nooo, you obviously don’t get it: Caged are
angry and confused! This isn’t lazy opportunism at
all. It’s pure emotion. That’s what hard-core is all
about!" Shut the f**K up already! You make me sick.
Go sleep on the street, or not get somewhere in life
because of the color of your skin, then lyrics about
being confined by walls will have some meaning.
There are innumerable moronic, FTW,
mommy-doesn’t-love-me lyrics (probably written while
on restriction or in detention) here too to go along
with the bad heavy metal riff-o-rama that acts as a
decoy for punk rock these days: "I stop and take a
look at my life. Through these years of pain held
under and hoarded back. F**k you and your people. I
got to get my hate out. I got to get it out,
muthaf**ker. Come get it." One of the "musicians" in
this band thanks "beer" in the sleeve-notes. I felt my
IQ descending 10 points per song on this masterpiece.
By Jason Thornberry, CanEHdian.com
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Caged - "Dead End" 