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Canadians hold claim to some of the biggest feats in the field of entertainment: the music world’s best-selling female artists (Celine Dion, Shania Twain ), the greatest hockey player of all-time (Wayne Gretzky), and arguably the planet’s most stretchable face (Jim Carrey ). It is in this tradition that Canadians express red-faced pride in their other – um – biggest export: the silicon-enhanced, busting-at-the-seams, Baywatch beauty Pamela Anderson Lee.
Born in a small British Columbia town, Pamela was “discovered" the way most celebrities are: displaying her talents. While in attendance at a BC Lion’s football game a curious cameraman focused his attention on her considerable assets, which were luckily covered in a tight Labatt’s Blue t-shirt, and blown up on the stadium’s Jumbotron (appropriate). ‘Luckily’ as the fans appreciated the giant bombshell with such frenzy that Labatt’s promptly signed her as the company’s “Blue Zone" girl.
After a short career in commercials Pamela received the break she needed and soon added “Playboy Model" to her resume. The world took notice and Anderson would forever remain in the spotlight (and in countless bedside magazines, and in widely distributed videos, and on countless webpages…).
Years ago Pamela’s high school yearbook proclaimed that her life’s greatest ambition was to be “a California beach bum". She achieved this ambition with 100% dedication. After a surgical enhancement which saw her personals get all-the-more personal, Pamela Anderson played out short appearances on Married…With Children and Home Improvement before settling into her trademark red bathing suit on the widely popular Baywatch series. Baywatch, with its millions of viewers and airtime in over 140 countries, solidified her fame, but did not spell out the end of her most prolific moments.
Pamela Anderson would soon appear on the big screen in the box-office flop Barbwire.
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Her portrayal of a “post-feminist action hero" failed to impress critics, but won her the admiration of at least one fan: the hard-rocking Motley Crue drummer, Tommy Lee.
Soon married in an unusual ceremony that saw Pamela wearing a white thong bikini and Tommy Lee swimming trunks, the ceremony may have been the most normal part of their marriage to date. Instead of a wedding ring Pamela tattooed her husband’s name on her finger. Not to be outdone, Tommy Lee had her name tattooed on his penis. The couple’s most bizarre moment came with the theft of a home video from their Los Angeles mansion. Those expecting a quiet portrayal of the Lee’s personal moments were not disappointed: the video was a now-infamous romp depicting the couple in very private acts. The video would see widespread distribution by the internet and give Pamela Anderson the distinction of being the most-searched-for celebrity by fans and the curious everywhere..
Reports soon emerged stating that Pamela was the victim of an abusive relationship. Although initially denying the accusations Anderson would soon file for divorce as the couple’s troubles became tabloid legend. Tommy Lee spent a brief stint in a local jail while Anderson moved on to the next stage of her emerging career: the star of the action/adventure television series V.I.P.
Pamela’s immortality is well defined yet her career is only short thus far. Time will ultimately write Pamela Anderson Lee’s story, as will the laws of gravity, as Pamela’s fame – and her breasts – inevitably sinks southward.
By Dave Brosha, CanEHdian.com
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